pissed

OK I am pissed and I'm gonna rant a bit today. Let me sketch in the background...my daughter in law was 12 when her mom died of cancer. Her dad raised her and sis from then...with a somewhat hands off approach, however they were close. She lost her first child in the first trimester and was midway thru the second pregnancy when he decided to move to another town halfway across Texas, a 12 hour drive from her....just because he wanted to... and wasn't around but a couple of times a year for the first 2 years of J's life, the whole 3rd pregnancy and the first 6 mo of L's life. He and his new wife moved back home. There was some family time but no one on one with the lil ones. Fast forward to this summer..J is 3 1/2 now and quite the lil miss. She is the kind of child that spoils you for normal rowdy children. When they started to the summer school 1 1/2 day a week the other grandmother (who has no children) somehow ended up picking her up on her half day. This was done i'm sure because I live 12 miles out of town and that mid day break falls right at naptime for the lil one too young to go to summers school this year, and they live in town. Well that's all fine, J needs to know that side of the family too and I shouldn't be selfish ( I have had her since she was 6 weeks old after all). One day I arrived at school and the grampa and gramma were picking up J and her cousin A who was there visiting for the summer. Neither one of them offered to pick up L and hug him or show any kind of affection and they watched him like he was some kind of alien being that had yet to be proven non-leathal. I was told 'well he can come when he gets a little bigger' ( his is a year and a half now and supposedly just too active for them to handle yet, but both of them are active and in good health). The following week they not only took the girls home with them but one of their friends as well! To date they have never spent or offered to spend even a half hour alone with L...but they can take other peoples kids for the afternoon? WTF!!!! I realize that I am probably not very objective about these kids...but that little boy is a pure joy. He is bright and beautiful and energetic and loving and totally wonderful. For him to be put off like a biscuit waiting to rise is just not right on so many levels. What a loss for them! I was told that one of them even refused to kiss him one day because he was a bit juicy! ( well yea ok it's gross..but can't you wipe his mouth first or your mouth after? Never refuse a love token is my motto!!) I am also concerned that J will somehow get the idea that she is special, she is very perceptive and intelligent. Lord knows a Diva complex is not a nice thing for a child to have!!! I know that my daughter in law wants her children to know and love her dad and the kids deserve that too...but right now I don't think these folks deserve these children!! What, you just put them off in a corner til they are old enough to fend for themselves then you make time to get to know them? Have they no clue of the special stuff they miss out on during those first years?? Do they even care???? pissed, hell yea I'm PISSED and I am likely to stay that way for a while over this.